How to Detect a Narcissist at work

Did you hear this word “Narcissist” before? Do you know what “Narcissism” is? 

www.mayoclinic.org says about “Narcissistic personality disorder” : One of several types of personality disorders which is a mental condition in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration, troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy for others.

In a single line, Google says:

You must know how to detect a Narcissist as they are extremely dangerous, can cause you any sort of professional harm for their own benefit and they lack a few very important human abilities. 

Let’s learn how to detect them:

They will always talk about THEMSELVES:

There is no room for others in their conversations. They are all about “me”, “mine”, “myself” and everything related to them.

They will always focus on their OWN SUCCESS:

Narcissists won’t ever talk about other people. It’s like “others” do not even exist to them. If your team leader is a narcissist, he/she will never talk about your contribution to the success and will always highlight his/her portion.

They NEVER LISTEN to other people’s opinions:

As they are the supreme in their eyes, they do not even bother to listen to your opinion. Even if they have the patience to listen to you, they will always push things to be done in their way in the end.

They NEVER fail (at least that is what they think. Stupid! No?):

They never fail in their eyes. Even if they fail, they will always try to draw their failure as a success in your eyes. Like a guy bowls 10 wide balls in the same over and tells you, “Look at me and you will know how NOT to bowl a wide ball”.

They will NEVER APOLOGIZE to anyone for anything:

Because they think they never make mistakes OR their mistakes are greater good, they will never apologize to you or to anyone for anything. If they apologize, you must know they have a hidden agenda behind this apology in the long run.

They are NOT doing anything for you, it’s always about THEMSELVES:

Even if you see a narcissist helping you or doing you a favor, you must know they have enough amount of benefit in that deal. They are never doing it for you and it always has something for them in it.

They are NOT team workers:

They will never say, “We did it”. Rather you will hear them saying, “I did it” or “I took this initiative” etc. This is one of the key features of narcissists and they are easy to detect when you are talking about a team or team’s effort.

They UNDERESTIMATE almost everyone on this planet:

They don’t even know you and they will end up thinking or even saying, “You will never win a battle against me”. Silly! I know, but yes, such silly people exist.

They are usually RACISTS:

They are either proud of their position or their high salary or their grade at work or something that they think they have achieved well in life. Worst is when they look good and they take this whole thing to a whole new level where they end up humiliating others for not achieving things or even for not looking good.

They try to play the “Leader” role but they end up playing the “Dictator” (Aladin Moth******):

In the name of leadership, they will usually intimidate other people, create big mess and try to frighten them to get their job done, will never care about their team. They will try to do everything themselves so that they don’t have to share the success with anyone else. In this process, they end up dictating people rather than leading them. They will always criticize their team for not being able to do things but won’t even mentor them to do or be better. Even if they are mentoring the team, it is NOT for team’s betterment. It’s often about showing off his/her own skills/knowledge.

In a nutshell, a narcissist is a person with a very poor mindset and personality who carries a strong and confident attitude to intimidate other people and press them to comply with their wishes/opinions. I guess now we have fair amount of idea of how to detect a Narcissist.

To be honest, I have worked with a few extreme Narcissists in my life. They used to irritate me in the beginning. By the time I grew older and gained more wisdom, I started feeling pity for them. Now they are a big joke for me and it’s really easy to deal with them. More importantly, I can now detect narcissists in less than a week.

In my next blog, I will explain how I deal with narcissists at work.

Thailand Visa Process seems to be a science fiction to you? Here’s the solution to your puzzle

Understanding the process:

Following are the high level steps of your VISA processing:

1. Prepare all the documents.
2. Fill out the application form.
3. Submit VISA application.

Key Notes:

1. You should set a tentative date and duration of your stay at Thailand as this will need to be mentioned in many places. Some documents will need to be collected as per these dates.
2. You may be working in an organization or might be a business man. The process is same regardless of your occupation. Just the documents will vary a bit.
3. You may also apply alone or with your spouse. Chance is more to get the visa if you are applying with your spouse.

Preparing the necessary documents:

Following are the documents that are safe to submit for a successful VISA application:

Must Submit:

1. Photocopy of your passport (Page 1 to 5).
2. Photocopy of your spouse’s passport (Page 1 to 5).
   – However, they will throw out the 1^st Still, keep it with you and leave the choice to keep/throw it up to them.
3. 2 copies of your recent passport size photograph.
4. 2 copies of your spouse’s passport size photograph.
   – Don’t pin/staple/stick the photos on the application form. VISA officer will assist you with this. Just bring the photos.
5. Your bank statement of last 6 months.
   – Try to collect the statement as late as possible before applying. Means, if you are applying on 5^th of June, collect the bank statement on 2^nd or 3^rd of that month.
   – Please note that, if you collect the statement on 2^nd, your statement will cover the transaction till 1^st. Means, the statement covers transactions till the day before your collect.

6. Bank solvency certificate.
   – This is actually a balance certificate. Try to collect this as late as possible. If you are collecting this document on 2^nd of a month, your account balance at the day end of 1^st will be provided the amount of your solvency.
   – If you are applying alone, make sure the balance is 60,000 BDT or more .If you are applying with your spouse, it is safer to have the balance above 1,30,000 BDT.
   – If you are depositing some money just to upgrade your balance and keeping it there for a few days, make sure you are depositing it at least a week earlier than the day you are collecting the solvency certificate, because, this transaction will be displayed in your bank statement.
7. No objection certificate from your organization.
   – This applies if you work for an organization.
   – The NOC should mention the following things:
   — You are a full time employee of that organization.
   — Your passport number/identification number that you will submit along with your application.
   — Your organization knows that you will be on leave during your tentative journey dates.
   — You do not have any criminal records.
   — Here’s a sample NOC:
   
8. Copy of your hotel booking.
   – Don’t worry. Hotels can be booked online without paying a penny. Just visit agoda.com or www.booking.com or any other similar sites, book a hotel on the exact dates of your tentative stay in Thailand.
   – It does not matter if you are living in this place or not. Just book it for your staying days at Thailand. Do the original booking/payment later.
9. Copy of your flight booking.
   – This is a strange document that you will need. Most of the airlines require you to confirm the booking by 1 day or less. Some airlines i.e.: US Bangla Airlines will require you to confirm the booking by a few hours. Don’t worry about that. They need a booking, you just provide it to them.
   – Just go to website of an airlines that fly from Bangladesh to Thailand. I prefer Bangladesh Biman to do this. Visit their site, select your dates and do a booking. Take a print out of this booking.
   – Please do this as late as possible. Best if you can do this just before you head to VISA application center.
10. Photo copy of your marriage certificate.
    – You will need to submit this if you are visiting with your spouse.
    – This certificate must be written in English.
11. An application for visa.
    – You will need to write a letter forwarding to the VISA Officer.
    – Below is a sample copy of that letter:
    
    
12. Filled out VISA application form.
    – This can be found from the following url: http://www.vfsglobal.com/Thailand/Bangladesh/Manual_Visa_Application_Form.html
    – Download and print the form out. Then fill out the form.
    – There is a guideline document that pretty much explains everything you need to know while filling out the form. This guideline can be downloaded from the above url.
    – Below is how the page looks and where you can download these two docs:
    

Additional Documents:

1. Photo copy of your latest TIN certificate.
   – This is a good to have document. If you don’t have a TIN certificate, don’t worry.
2. Photo copy of your office ID card.
   – This is also not required. But, it’s always good to provide this document. This one adds more value and credibility of your application.
3. Photo copy of your office visiting card.
   – Address of your office can be found here. Also, the phone numbers are here. This could be a good supporting document.

Prepare the application and submit it:

Once you are ready with all your documents, you will need to fill out the application form and go for submission. Please note that you will need to fill a separate form for your spouse. Means, one for you and one for your partner. Information will vary relevantly.

Things to know while filling out the form:

1. The application form looks like the following (this is actually the guideline form):
   
2. “Number of Entries Required”: Write 1.
3. “Occupation”: While filling this out, make sure information matches against your passport. Let’s say your spouse is a house wife and she studies as well. Now, if you write “Student” in place of her occupation, they might be asking for documents from her institute acknowledging she is going out of country (like you need one from your organization, described at point #7 under “Must Submit” document list). It is always safe to mention “House Wife” if she is really one.
   – If your partner is working as well, she might also need to submit a NOC from her organization.
4. “Permanent Address”: Copy the permanent address mentioned exactly on your passport.
5. “Date of Arrival in Thailand”: Mention the exact date of your arrival in Thailand.
   – This should match with flight booking date and hotel booking date (1^st day of your booked hotel’s date).
6. “Name and Address of Local Guarantor”: Mentions a colleague’s name or a friend’s name. It will be good if she/he knows your whereabouts and about your journey. If they call this person, they might ask some details about you i.e.: where do you work, how’s your reputation at work etc.
   – Mention a person’s name who is attentive to his phone and answers calls.
7. “Name and Address of Guarantor in Thailand”: There’s 90% chance you don’t have a guarantor in Thailand. Just don’t bother and write N/A.
8. “Signature and Date”: Sign and put the dates on the day you go for submission.

Submitting your VISA Application:

In Bangladesh, there is an organization named VFS Global who do the VISA processing of Thailand. However, the right to reject or approve VISA applications remains to the Royal Thai Embassy. You will need to go to VFS Global office in order to submit your VISA application. Below are the details:

1. Prepare all documents as per above instructions.
2. Do not pin/staple any document with each other. Yes, if a single document is multi page i.e.: bank statement, you must staple the pages to make it one.
   – However, if you have multiple passports, please PIN all them together. It always helps and keeps your passports away from theft, loss.
3. Bring all your documents inside a folder. Helps you manage your documents and also good for their security.
4. Bring around 3,500 BDT for each application. Means, 7,000 BDT for two applications.
5. The application center opens at 8:30 AM in the morning and you can submit applications till 1:00 PM in the afternoon pm Sunday to Thursday except Government holidays. Find the address of VISA application center below in Notes section.
6. Reach your designated VFS office (Dhaka, Chittagong or Sylhet) before 12;30 PM (to be on safe side). Take a token and they will do the security check.
7. Please note that, your bags will be left at the first counter (where you get the token). So, it is better for you not to carry anything precious that will remain inside the bag. Lighters or any other dangerous objects are not allowed either.
8. Once you enter the premises of VFS, they will call applicants one by one. Most of the applicants you will see there will be the agents (that we call “Dalal”).
9. Once your time comes, reach the designated counter.
10. Most of the VISA officers there are really friendly and helpful.
11. The officer will check all your documents, pick the necessary ones and return you the rest. She/he will PIN/stick your photos as well.
12. Then she/he will give you a slip and ask you to do the payment to the bank that is located in the same room.
13. You go, do the payment and collect the slips from the bank.
14. Return these slips to the VISA officer.
15. He will check the payment, do necessary jobs and will return you one long slip.
16. This is the one you will need to collect your passport.
17. Please note that, your passports will be kept to VFS.
18. That’s it, return home and pray that your application turns out successful.

Additional Notes:

1. VFS Global Website: http://www.vfsglobal.com/Thailand/Bangladesh
2. Addresses of VFS Global offices in Bangladesh: http://www.vfsglobal.com/Thailand/Bangladesh/contact_us.html
3. Public holidays of VFS Global in Bangladesh: http://www.vfsglobal.com/Thailand/Bangladesh/Public_holidays.html
4. Tracking your VISA application: http://www.vfsglobal.com/Thailand/Bangladesh/after_submission.html
5. Sample VISA application letter: Thailand Visa Application.

আপনার বাচ্চা ঠিক জিনিসটা শিখছে তো?

দোকানে এখন ১ টাকার বদলে ক্যান্ডি ধরিয়ে দেওয়া হয়। এমন ভাবেই সেইদিন একটা ম্যাঙ্গো ক্যান্ডি পেলাম আর ওটা পকেটে ছিল। বাসায় ফিরলাম। ত্রিশূল (আমার ছেলে) দুষ্টামি করছিল আর আমি ওর হাতে ধরিয়ে দিলাম ক্যান্ডিটা। ও এখনো বোঝে না এটা খাওয়ার জিনিস, আমরা বুঝতেও দেইনা, শিখাই ও না (বাচ্চাদের জন্যে এইসব খাবার এক্কেবারেই ভালোনা, আর তাছাড়াও কোথায় কিভাবে বানানো হয়েছে তাও জানি না)। কিন্তু, ও নতুন কিছু দেখলেই প্রশ্ন করে “এটা কি? এটা কি? এটা কি? এটা কি?”। এই ভাবে বার বার বলতেই থাকে আর আমরাও বার বার উত্তর দেই আর ওকে শিখাই।

যাই হোক, যেহেতু সে জানতে চাইছিল ওটা কি, আমার পরিবারের একজন সদস্য বললো “এটা চকলেট”। এর পর আমার সাথে তার কিছু তর্ক বিতর্ক হলো। ওটাই নিচে তুলে ধরলাম।

• “এটা চকলেট”।
• আমিঃ “এটা চকলেট না। এটা ক্যান্ডি। ম্যাঙ্গো ক্যান্ডি। চকলেট একটা ফ্লেভার, ভ্যানিলা বা স্ট্রবেরী এর মতন। আর এই ক্যান্ডিটা ম্যাঙ্গো ফ্লেভারের”।
• “আপনি যখন ছোট ছিলেন ত্রিশূলের মতন, আপনিও তো চকলেটই বলতেন”।
• আমিঃ “বলতাম, তুমিও বলতে। আমি, তুমি আমরা ভুলটা শিখেছি কারন আমাদের কেউ ঠিক করে দেয়নি। তুমি তো এখন জানো এটা চকলেট না, তাহলে ওকে ভুলটা শেখাচ্ছো কেন”?
• “বাচ্চারা এইভাবেই কথা বলে। ও যদি কোথাও যায় এটা দেখে, তাহলে তো ও চকলেট ই বলবে তাই না”?
• আমিঃ “কেন চকলেট বলবে? ও যদি জেনেই থাকে এটা ক্যান্ডি, তাহলে ক্যান্ডিই বলবে। আর তাছাড়াও ভাবো, এক যায়গায় ১০ টা বাচ্চা, সবাই চকলেট বলছে আর ত্রিশূল ঠিক ভাবে ক্যান্ডি বলছে, তাতে কি কোন সমস্যা হবে? বরং ওকে অনেক স্মার্ট একটা বাচ্চা মনে হবে”।

যার সাথে তর্ক হচ্ছিল, সে তার পরও হাড় মানেনি, কিন্তু আর তর্কও করেনি। আমি বাজে বকছি এমন একটা ভাব করে ক্ষ্যান্ত দিল রণে।

আমার স্বল্প বুদ্ধি থেকে সবার জন্যে দুটো খোলা উপদেশঃ

• ভুল করলে ভুলটা স্বীকার করুন। অযথা এটা ওটা বলে নিজেকে আরো লজ্জায় ফেলবেন না।
• বাচ্চারা বাচ্চা আর তারা কিছু বোঝে না আর আপনার সব কথাই তাদের কাছে সত্যি, তাই বলে তাদের ভুলভাল শেখাবেন না। কখনো কখনো বাচ্চারাও আপনার ভুল শুধরে দিতে পারে। ব্যাপারটাকে অপমান হিসাবে না নিয়ে, নিজেকে শুধরানোর একটা সুযোগ হিসেবে নিন।

শেখার কোন শেষ নেই, কোন বয়স নেই। নিজে শিখুন, বাচ্চাদেরও ঠিক জিনিসটাই শেখান।

 

 

Testers – have to do the same, monotonous, boring but still important test everyday? Why not appoint a virtual assistant? ;)

Most of us, the QAEs, often have some tests to do which are typically boring, monotonous, easy to do but still time consuming and the worst part is we have to do these tests everyday.

One good example could be, check everyday if a particular site is live or not. I had this issue in my project when everything was alright when we were leaving the office and the site somehow went down when client started testing it. Things like these may often happen after a crucial deployment or environment changes in servers. The server also may go down. There could be tons of reasons that might cause the site not running. I thought, why not build something that will check this every single day on behalf of me? And yes, the one and only and the awesome way to do it is to automate this whole process. Below we will see what I did to build such a tool.

First I defined what I want to test with the tool:

The motive of test is to determine if the requested site is up or not. So, I decided to check if the site’s login page can be successfully loaded and then check if a user can successfully login to the site. It would send email to “me”/”a group of users” in case of failure page load or failure login. I wanted check if a user can login; because, it may also happen that the site is up and running but for some reason (database connection is somehow incorrect after deployment, database server is down, there were issues in deployment, or a ghost had a bite on the site :P) the login is not successful.

Below is how I designed my test:

Flow Chart for Site Login Tester Functionality

How I implemented it:

I wrote a console application in C# to execute above tests. I added Selenium WebDriver references and added ChromeDriver.exe to the project first and then started writing the codes. To keep the code reusable without code-editing/re-build, I have used application configuration file to easily manipulate some data for testing. So, you will also need to add assembly System.Configuration to your project. Please find how to do all these tasks in my other post. Click this link to download the code I have written inside the console application along with the configuration file. Let me explain the codes and appconfig file below:

Prepare your C# project to write a test with Selenium WebDriver, xUnit, ChromeDriver and SpecFlow

How to include Selenium Webdriver, Selenium Support and SpecFlow in your C#project:

• Create a new project or open your existing project in Visual Studio.
• Open “Tools” > “Library Package Manager” > “Package Manager Console”
• In the loaded console type Install-Package Selenium.WebDriver and hit enter.
• Then type Install-Package Selenium.Support and hit enter.
• Then type Install-Package SpecFlow.xUnit and hit enter.
• Then type Install-Package Selenium.WebDriver.ChromeDriver and hit enter.
• These commands are case sensitive and type it as it is mentioned above. Btw, it will require your computer to be connected to internet in order to download the packages.

 

If you want to use the configuration manager (which I do in all my projects):

• Open your project.
• From Solution Explorer right click on “References” > Click “Add Reference”
• List of assemblies will appear.
• Select System.Configuration here and click “OK”
• You are done.